NUTTIN' BUT A GERIATRIC THANG

Snoop Dogg (née Snoop Doggy Dogg) is on tour in Colorado this week. His appearance garnered a op-ed eulogy to a gangsta in yesterday's Greeley Tribune, addressed to Snoop himself:

You got yourself that MTV show two years ago, "Doggy Fizzle Televizzle," and since then, you've been in some goofy movies, such as "Soul Plane" and "Starsky and Hutch," and you've been in some even goofier T-Mobile commercials with pop icon Wayne Newton and Paris Hilton, who is famous just because, and in one of those commercials, you ask them when you add fabric softener. You are even in an animated film, "Racing Stripes," where you play ... a dog.

Your image has softened like your fabric, too, since those days back in 1993, when you released "Doggystyle," your first album that made you a sensation (it was the first rap record to debut at number one).

On that album, you rapped "Murder was the Case," bragged about smoking weed and sipping on gin and juice and asked people what your name was (actually, your mother f -- um, well, we can't say because it's a family newspaper).

How's having an affectionate column written about you in a family newspaper to reinforce your softness? Well, everyone gets old and lame eventually, according to Sick Boy's "unifying theory of life" — even "true gang-banging hard-core" rappers. As the author points out, Snoop's career should have been over a long, long time ago. Instead, he's more famous than ever. Would that we all, in our old age, be 32-year-old fat stack-smoking multi-millionaires.

---

posted by WWB at 1:27 PM |