GREAT SCAMS OF THE INTERNET

As longtime readers will know, for some time I've had an ongoing feature called "Great Spams of the Internet" — basically just posting amusing or perplexing spam e-mails I've received, followed by a snarky reply. Eventually it occurred to me, why not try to engage my spammers/scammers? It certainly couldn't result in any more spam (could it?) and it might even annoy them enough to take me off the list.

Only in one case have I got a response back, but I'll have to go digging for it. In the meantime, consider this one the first, from late last week:

From: Douglas Morris [mailto:douglasmorris1@msn.com]
Sent: Fri 10/28/2005 11:44 PM
To: douglasmorris1@msn.com
Subject: Cooperation

Hello,
I am contacting you to partner with me in respect of transfer of certain funds, which is being held in a floating account in my organization, Fountain Securities , in Madrid Spain. I am privileged to have full knowledge of the availability of this fund due to my function and position in the organization at present. I have to contact you because it is imperative for me have the cooperation of a foreigner to be able to transfer the fund out of my country. This fund, was deposited by Mr. George Martins, who died in 1994 without leaving any information of any next of kin to inherit the fund. The account therefore has not been operated since his death.

The total amount involved is Fifteen Million American Dollars. My name is Douglas Morris. I would give the details of the transfer process if I receive your response and am convinced that you are willing and dependable to carry out the transaction with me in absolute confidentiality. We have to establish mutual trust such that it will be glaring to both parties that we could work with open mind. On transfer of the fund into your account,your share would be 25% of the total sum while the rest part would be for me and I intend to invest the major part of my share in your country with your assistance.

I would appreciate if you could respond to me on my more private email:dougmorris01@k.ro. Kindly state your telephone number so that I could call you too.

I await your response.

Sincerely.
Douglas Morris.

What luck! I replied with enthusiasm commensurate with the offer:

From: [Me]
To: dougmorris01@k.ro
Subject: RE: Cooperation

I would like Fifteen Million American Dollars!

And best of all, I am super duper trustworthy!

Please call Me NOW at 202-266-7104!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You will NOT be disapppppointed!?!

And yet... nothing. That's even my real office fax number!

What a rip-off. Guess this means I can't trust the Internet.

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posted by WWB at 3:02 PM |